Stuck? Right there with ya...

Okay so one...sorry you submitted this in May and it is now August. That's my b. Motivation, who is she?

This one really hits home for me. I struggle with feeling "stuck" pretty regularly.

Am I afraid of failing?

Am I afraid that if I try something I'll be worse off than I am now?

Am I afraid of not being good at something?

Am I just too lazy to do anything new?

It is really easy to find a "good enough" groove. The job, the relationship, the friends...whatever it may be. It is good enough so nothing is...wrong. Nothing is bad it's just not quite right. You're not having to fix anything, to react to anything. But that lack of reaction that's the problem.

It is so so hard to shift from reacting to life and to instead be proactive and CREATE a life.

What are my goals?

What are my boundaries?

Where do I want to live?

What is my ideal....EVERYTHING?

No idea.

I WISH that I could give you a real answer. That I had the recipe for getting off your ass and how to build your best life.

But sadly, I don't. I could spew off some shit about meditating and reading more and waking up everyday at 7AM but I won't.

None of that works for me so I won't recommend it to you. All that I will recommend is DO NOT beat yourself up. Do not tell yourself that you're being lazy, or fucking something up, or worst of all...missing something.

Instead, pay attention to what makes you feel excited. What makes you smile for no reason and like you've had way too much caffeine.

When I was younger, if I ever felt _alive_ I would kind of run/skip down my hallway in excitement. I am trying to focus on that feeling. I am trying to find - and keep - the people, experiences, hobbies, whatever, that make me feel that way. That is what I am striving for.

And those things that don't, get rid of them, get out of them, move on from them.

I will tell you right now, I am not good at this. I am 28 and still very much trying to learn how to listen to myself. I know this will always be an issue for me. It will always be something I am having to consciously remind myself to pay attention to.

I've stayed in relationships for far too long. Stayed at jobs for FAR FAR too long. I've avoided decisions because I didn't know what the right answer was. I haven't stuck up for myself. I haven't fought for me. I've done whatever it is that other people needed me to. I focused...who am I am kidding.. I focus on what is best for other people. I do what helps them.

Then I find myself where you are. Stuck.

When I finally realize I've gotten myself there again, I try to do something to shock myself back into my life. I try to do something completely out of the ordinary for me. Usually this would mean going somewhere new...but...ya know...we being responsible and all during COVID so...

I'll leave you with this... try.

And if you do find that magic recipe, SEND IT MY WAY.


Need advice?